Get the life you want: It’s time to start chasing your dreams!

Are you a dream chaser or a dream postponer? If you are a dream postponer, you’re likely putting off your happiness and waiting for ‘someday’.  But, girlfriend, today is yesterday’s ‘someday’, so its time to ditch that mindset and start shaking things up to get the life you want!  Best start chasing your dreams because no one is going to come along and hand your life to you.  It’s up to you, baby!

Going for what we want in life is such a huge part of what makes up our happiness, so postponing our dreams and never giving them value is a big issue!

For a long time, I didn’t have major life-changing dreams.  I lived by what was expected of me and didn’t think much beyond that.

My biggest dream was to go to Europe (Paris, specifically) and when I was 26 I made that happen.  My next big dream was to be an Interior Designer, so when I was 28, I applied and was accepted to the New York School of Interior Design (I went there part time for years, but never finished my degree for other reasons, which I was fine with).  

In the past year or so, my current dream/passion/obsession has become to start a business via this website (well, actually through the new one I’m working on right now!) to help women lead better lives.  I want more for you and I am working really hard on making this happen!  

This is my biggest dream to date and definitely has the capacity to offer some major life changes if I make my dreams a reality.

I know I can’t achieve all of my dreams (ummm…hello…Ryan Reynolds is never going to ask me to marry him no matter how much I might dream about that!).  But, for any dream that I feel is achievable, even if it scares the crap out of me, it goes on my list to make happen in this lifetime.

Sadly, I don’t think most people live with this same philosophy and that makes me sad, so today, I want to dive into this topic and if I’m doing my job, by the end of this post, you’ll be ready to start chasing one (or more!) of your dreams!

Feel free to start small if this is new territory for you…that’s okay!  Every time you make one happen, you’ll gain confidence and the fire in your belly will burn a little stronger.

Why people DON’T chase their dreams

Some people have no problems going after what they want, but others seem to categorize their dreams as things that would be nice ‘someday’.

I think there are a few things going into that mindset that we need to address and fix:

 We’re busy…  Let’s face it, we all have a million and one things to do any given day, am I right?  Dealing with the “right now” can take all of our time, especially for those of you with families!

But, here’s the thing…there is always some time or some way for something you feel passionate about and have a burning desire to achieve or experience.

 Guilt…  Making time to do something for ourselves can cause some folks to feel immense guilt.  They feel guilty about taking time away from their family or putting money towards something for themselves.

Here’s some tough love, ladies…drop the guilt.  I know it’s hard!  If you can’t completely get rid of it, then make peace with it and don’t let it interfere with your mind when you’re thinking of your dreams.  Guilt will always be detrimental to your dreams and to yourself.  Push past it, boost yourself up, and go for it.

 We feel our dreams are for someone else and not us…  Unfortunately, some people think the life they dream about is for someone else and not someone like them.  This is so NOT true!!

Don’t tell yourself and for goodness sake’s don’t believe it.  If you can dream it, you can be it or do it.  The only person holding you back from reaching your dreams is yourself.  Only you have the power to remove that roadblock.

 We have no idea what to do to get what we want…   Dreams are nothing more than goals without a plan.  

If you have no idea where to start, try breaking it down into chunks.  That will likely help it seem a lot less overwhelming.  If you still need help with that, you’re in luck!  Hang with me girlfriend and I can help you with that (pssst….I’m going to have a course on this exact topic later this year!).

Why you should chase your dreams

Now that we’re past all the reasons for why people either put their dreams on hold, or never go after them, let’s talk about why you SHOULD go for them!

 Life is too short not too   Seriously, people…I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…We only get one shot at this life and it’s up to YOU to make it what you want!

In the blink of an eye, 10 years, 20 years, 50 years are gone.  You can’t wait.  You have to make your dreams a priority NOW or you’ll never do them. You just might get to the end of your days with some serious regrets. (Think about it…no one that’s on their death bed say they wish they had worked more.  They wish they had spent more time with their family, took time off and went on that dream vacation, or went for that one thing they always wanted to do.)

 Your dreams matter   Yes…your dreams matter.  Write it down, repeat it to yourself, tattoo it on your forearm, I don’t care, but the #1 reason you should go for what you want in this life…your dreams matter.  And NEVER let anyone tell you they don’t!!

 It’ll enrich your life and give you a new found purpose   Once you start going for what you want, I think you’ll be surprised at how many doors start opening for you and other opportunities you could never dream of come your way.

An easy dream to use as an example here is travel.  Visiting a place you’ve never been will change so much for you.  It will open up your eyes and life to SO much more than you could imagine.

The same holds true for going after your dream career.  It doesn’t really matter what it is…taking steps toward your dreams will bring new things into your life and truly enrich it in ways that you couldn’t imagine.

 Why not??   Simply put…why not go for your dreams?  What have you got to lose?

How to start chasing your dreams

Now that I’ve got you fired up and ready to start making things happen, let me give you a few tips for getting yourself on the right path for success!

First, you have to  tell yourself you’re worth it .  Let’s say your dream is to open a cupcake shoppe (I use ‘shoppe’ since it sounds more girly & fancy! This isn’t your standard, run of the mill cupcake place!!).  Instead of thinking its a dream for someone else or that you will never have the money or no one would want your cupcakes, think…I deserve to have my own businesspeople will love my cupcakesI’m worth taking the chance and making this happen!

Next,  visualize yourself actually doing or achieving your dream .  Don’t just see yourself through the lens of a dream that will never happen, change the lens and see yourself through the eyes of ‘this is my future and this will happen’.

That slight mental shift should give you a little kick.  If you start thinking of your dream as when instead of if/never, you’ll automatically start walking that path.

So cupcake girl, see yourself in that adorable shop.  See customers lined out the door.  Feel how amazing it feels to know you did it and reached your dream.

Then take a deep breath and remind yourself that you will do this and you’re worth it.

 Break it down into do-able chunks .  This is something else I’ve said before that I’ll say again…big goals are nothing more than a bunch of little goals.

Instead of being overwhelmed by the one big goal, break it up into smaller chunks and then just focus on those one at a time.

It might take you 6 months or it might take you 6 years.  Either way, if you are continually working on it and checking things off a list (i.e. seeing results and progress), you’ll keep going!!

For opening a cupcake shoppe, there’s obviously a LOT to do to get to that point, right?  Figure out what needs to be done in the short term vs. long term and start working on things today!

 Do something every single day to achieve your dream .  It might be something small, it might be something big, but you can do something every single day to get a step closer to making your dream a reality!  

The baby steps will lead to big progress and the constant motion will keep your goals present and inspiring.

How to Deal with the Negative Folks

Before we go, I wanted to be sure to touch on one last topic since you are bound to run into this when you start making some changes in your life.

Unfortunately, there will always be someone that will tell you that you can’t or you’re crazy.  It could be a friend, a sister, your mom, your favorite aunt, etc.  But I promise you, someone will try to convince you not to give it a try (either bluntly or more passive aggressive, manipulatively)

This sucks and it’s hard, but you have a couple of options…

 Don’t share your plans with them…   Let them think you’ve given it up.  Yes, it’s somewhat deceitful, but not really…what you do with your life is nobody’s business but yours (now…if your spouse or significant other is the naysayer, this is a bit more challenging, especially if your dream involves finances!).

 Talk to them…  Have a heart to heart with them telling them how important this is to you and how much their support would mean to you. Maybe they think it’s a whim and they’re trying to protect you, but if they realize how important this is to you, that may be the ticket to getting their support.

 Don’t take it personally…  Realize that their lack of support probably has nothing to do with you and is more of a reflection of something going on with them. Perhaps, they’ve always had a dream but never went for it and there’s a bit of jealousy that you’re strong enough and motivated enough to go after what you want.

Maybe they feel threatened by you achieving your goal (i.e. if you successfully open a cupcake shoppe it might make your best friend feel like she hasn’t done anything with her life).  You never know what’s going on with someone else, but your life is just that…YOUR life.  You can’t let others get in the way of you going after what you know if you know this is the right path for you.

 Sever ties (or greatly distance yourself)…  In extreme cases, you might have to distance yourself from them or completely cut them off if it really becomes a negative issue.

I say “extreme” because this is obviously not the desired solution, but in some cases, if the situation becomes toxic or you feel it is affecting your ability to follow through, then it might be something to consider (obviously, there would need to be some consideration on your part on whether losing this person is worth achieving your dream…I’m not suggesting you bulldoze over people to get what you want, but if you know in your heart what you’re going for is the right thing for you and your life, then this might be necessary.).

Fortunately, I haven’t been faced with this, but I would absolutely consider it if I felt it was necessary!

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So, I hinted earlier that I will be offering a course on how to turn your dreams into realities.  If you struggle with not making your dreams a priority, I’d love to hear a little bit more about why that’s the case!

If you’re up for it and have a few minutes, would you consider answering some anonymous questions?  This will help me craft a course that really digs into what you are struggling with!  Even if you’d have no plans on taking such a course, your feedback and experiences would be super helpful for me and others!

DREAMS!

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Alright ladies…your turn!  Fess up…are you a dream chaser or a dream postponer?  If you’re the latter, have I maybe intrigued you an eensy weensy bit to start going after them?  Leave me a comment and let me know!!

 

Comments

  1. 1

    Lisa K says

    This post had a lot of good advice and was very motivating! One of my dreams was to get my teaching license and teach internationally again. I was one of those people that “put it off” for last year, but this fall I’ll be working overseas again! I know that it was the right decision for me.

    • 2

      says

      Hi Lisa! So glad to hear you are following one of your dreams…that is AWESOME!! Best of luck as you start that journey this fall….I know it’ll be such a positive and amazing experience for you :). Thanks for stopping by!

  2. 3

    says

    SUCH a positive and inspirational post, Vicky! And love finding out you have an interior decorator soul in ya! Come decorate my house! lol! Great advice on how to get going – I especially relate with the breaking it down into chunks. Sometimes we want our goal to happen today – but in all reality it does take time so be patient. Great post!! xx, Karen /// http://www.GlamKaren.com

    • 4

      says

      Thanks Karen!! Yeah, some of our dreams can be accomplished somewhat quickly, but others are marathons instead of sprints and really require perseverance (which can be hard! but, if you can stick through it, it really shows that it’s something you want!).

  3. 5

    says

    Great post! I did a lot of thinking after reading this. You hit a few things head on…we tend to procrastinate when we know that things will be harder than a snap of the finger. Way to inspire this Monday! <3

    • 6

      says

      Hi Alanna! I’m so glad to hear this post made you do some thinking…it’s almost easier to put things on hold instead of diving in (and probably fear on not reaching the dream/goal!), but it definitely pays off to take that step :). I hope this inspired you to reach for those dreams!

    • 8

      says

      Yes! So glad you got to the point where you pushed past that mentality and went for it anyway :)…don’t think of it as wasted time, think of it as a time of growth and learning! The good thing is that you’re reaching for the stars now :)!

  4. 9

    says

    This post is Amazing! It is very apparent that you spent a lot of time on this and for that I want to thank you! One of my many dreams has always been to go to NYC and I am finally seeing that through (I’m arriving on Friday) Another dream is to become and interior designer, I would love to talk to you about the program at NYSID sometime.

    • 10

      says

      Hi Mara! Yay! So glad you enjoyed the post :)…and SO happy to hear you’re making one of your dreams happen this week!! You picked a great weekend to visit the city since summer will be in full swing (but hopefully not too too hot :)). It’s been several years since I stopped taking classes at NYSID, but if you want to chat, feel free to send me an email at vicky@randomlittlefaves.com. I loved my classes there!! I stopped when I realized I wanted to take my life in a different direction, but loved, loved, loved the time I spent there :).

  5. 11

    says

    Super motivating post! It can be very scary to break out of one’s comfort zone and fully go after a dream. Sometimes all it takes is some validation and a push. I think this post is the type of validation and push someone reading might need. Awesome topic!

    • 12

      says

      Thanks Jessica!! It can definitely be scary, but oh so rewarding when you reach that dream, right? There’s something about facing that fear and meeting it head on that just makes success even sweeter! :)

  6. 13

    says

    What an encouraging post! And I could not agree more. Our dreams and goals are meant to be part of our life, not just a someday…maybe! It takes courage and intentionality. But when you get started, it’s amazing! Thanks for the great post!

  7. 15

    says

    Loving the direction you are headed in Vicky, and I’m excited to hear more about your course!
    I’m actually in the middle of making some huge changes in order to make room to try pursuing some dreams. So far I have found the BEST method to be not telling everyone what I’m hoping and wishing for, only my nearest and dearest.
    It helps a lot to keep out the negative voices while you’re still weeding through and figuring things out!

    • 16

      says

      Thanks Abby!! Isn’t it crazy how effective keeping your dreams (mostly) to yourself can be? It’s sad, but unfortunately, necessary sometimes!! Good luck with everything going on your world…I wish you nothing but the best and biggest success! :)

  8. 17

    says

    So many great tips and suggestions! I think a lot of times fear and self-doubt get in my way. I’ve always been a big dreamer and I’ve seen a lot of those dreams come true. I recently read the book Uncertainty by Jonathan Fields and his advice was to not only visualize the outcome of the dream you desire, but visualizing yourself doing the steps it takes to get there. That sort of goes along with listing the steps it takes to reach your goals. I can get easily sidetracked and off course so being able to prioritize is another big key for me.

    • 18

      says

      Thanks Dawn!! And yes! Visualization can be such a great way to see your dreams as reality! I love to do vision board type pages for my visual journal which really helps me visualize what I want and what it means to me :). I’ll have to check that book out…sounds right up my alley :). If you decide to go for the Joy Equation class that we chatted about on Instagram, I hope you enjoy it!! :)

  9. 19

    says

    This post is SO in line with where my head has been at lately! Which is why a few days ago I BOOKED MY 30 DAY TRIP TO EUROPE!!!!!!
    I also started a blog all about it because I can’t handle myself. And I’m a travel newbie. And I want to tell the world.
    I looked at it this way: I am fed up with living the “IF this THEN that” lifestyle. SO I took the leap (whether I could afford it or not).
    Never looking back, I feel I need this. This and so many other things. I am tired of only dreaming, I’m ready to make shit happen 😉

    • 20

      says

      Hey Glady!! Yay…so awesome to hear this is where you are in life right now and you’re seeing the worth in going for what you want…that’s AWESOME!! I am SO envious of your 30 day trip to Europe…that’s on my bucket list and I will make that happen one day, so go have fun and enjoy it for the rest of us stuck at work, lol!! What a great opportunity and experience that will be :). Definitely go make shit happen!!

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